The Ampipe High School locker room from All the Right Moves (1983)
exemplifies the sacred yet malodourous, bacteria-ridden home of men. We find the Bulldogs gearing up for practice,
readying for their rival, Walnut Heights.
Gearing up in Ampipe apparently means a dance scene amongst the
players; the only scene in the movie tailored for the female audience. It’s cheesy, but not solely for its
absurdity.
The real violation occurs over 14 seconds of a meat-titted, beer body with
graying chest hair doing their best locker room jig. That's 14 seconds of Tank!
An eternity for a single shot. An eternity of screen time for that guy.
We, at Nitflix, are not asking for too much when we beseech a
re-edit! 3 seconds is the maximum
elapsed time we are requesting. The
editors can fill with whatever they want with that remaining 11 seconds.
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